Thursday, December 30, 2010

Oh sweet six months :)

Well I made it to 6 months! WHOHOO!  I can't believe it and yet it's like the grass is always greener, because now I am thinking, "If I can just make it to 7 months..."  but I guess maybe that's the way God designed me to set goals and once I reach them to set more.  I just need to enjoy where I am at too, though.

Things here are pretty much the same, I guess.  I've been feeling pretty good for the most part, other than super duper tired.  I fell asleep on the couch at about 7:30, got up and went to bed at 8, woke up about 11:30 and didn't fall back asleep :(  AHHH!  I am dragging!
I am feeling more water retention latley too.  My hands feel like I ate a super salty meal, but I've been majorly diligent about staying away from the salt.  I'm trying to drink tons of water and keep moving hoping that will help ease it alittle.

This next month of being pregnant will be less busy then it has been.  I am going home on January 25th for a WHOLE week!  I cannot wait!! Although I am sad that Bryan can't come too :(  But someone has to work I guess!  I get to see my family and friends and just relax!!  I love being home because it's truly relaxing, no cleaning staring me in the face (my dad is super cleaning man :)  and I just love laying on the couch by the fire.  It's one of my favorite places ever!

I have my next (and LAST 2nd trimester) appointment with Kim, my midwife on the 17th and will be doing the glucose test, BLEH :P 

Short but sweet update :)  Have a great day!

Thursday, December 23, 2010

5 and 3/4 months, 23 weeks, 119 days to go, 4 months from yesterday! - I LOVE countdowns :)

Total weight gain: So, the scale said I gained 3 pounds, but I think it's probably more like 1 or 2 because of the oatmeal with banana, 2 liters of water, and venti coffee I had before I got there, so I'm floating (ha ha) around 12 or 13 so far

How big is baby? says: Baby is the size of a large mango -- just over a pound. (Length: more than 11 inches.)

Maternity clothes: Nothing new here still sticking with my 2 pairs of maternity pants and beband, feel like I might need some new shirts, cause my options are limited on length.

Stretch marks: Nada

Sleep:  Not been the greatest, I am completely exhausted most of the time and wake up and then can't fall back asleep.  Oddly enough I upped my water intake to 3 liters and I slept through the night last night...I thought I was going to pay for it dearly too!  So maybe hydration is the key?! Who knows I will keep giving it a try and see how it goes.

Movement: Getting more and more every day.  The kicks are getting stronger too, sometimes I am afraid she is going to hurt herself (or me:) , it's so forceful.  She is definitely just like her mama (and papa :) and gets demanding when she is hungry, she kicks more before I have a late lunch or dinner.

Food cravings: Yeah still not really cravings, per Se. For dinner, I have been having steamed zucchini with a grain like quinoa, bulgur or couscous and this tahini garlic lemon dressing that I made, it is seriously yum!  Lunch is still the protein packed bulgur with tomatoes, mushrooms, spinach and garbanzos (30+ grams baby!).  Breakfast I have been making oatmeal with some hemp seed and banana.  So throw a few snacks in there and I am pretty much back in the protein range I need to be, and feeling much, MUCH better.

Food aversions: Ok, so I seriously think that the person in the cubical behind me is making chili from scratch in there!  There are lots of clanking around and the spice smell is much so that I was actually sneezing, I think from breathing it in! YUCK!

Belly button: Same-o, Same-o

What I'm looking forward to: Looking forward to next week because then I will be 6 months!! whohoo!  Also this weekend and spending time with Bryan's family and mine (via good old Skype) and relaxing a little.

Weekly Wisdom: Planning ahead is good, but there's definitely a line you can cross into obsessive compulsive worrying about everything...I've been flirting with that line a little.  Also, taking things with a grain of salt, especially comments from well meaning people.  A girl I work with told me that "You don't look pregnant, just wider."   AWESOME!  I got a little offended by that at first, but ya know what, whatever!  I've learned through the years that some people feel compelled to comment on things and words just come out of their mouth that aren't really attached to major analysis, unlike the the things that I usually say that are DOA (those Law and Order Episodes are paying off!!) because of OVER analysis.  So we all have our issues :)

Weekly joys: We found a doctor for Lola!! He's very pro natural and he wrote a book called Detoxing for Dummies!  Had a great appointment with my midwife, Kim.  Lola's heart rate was 143 bpm.  I'm measuring right on schedule.  It's so good to hear her little heart and know that everything is going right.  We are truly blessed!!

Wednesday, December 15, 2010

22 weeks down...18 more to go!

Total weight gain: like I said before, no scale for this mama!  We will see at my appointment next week.....Dun, DUn, DUN!

How big is baby?  A papaya!

Maternity clothes: Hit the jackpot at Burlington and got jeans and 2 shirts, plus a sweater at a maternity consignment shop.  So I'll be good for another few weeks anyways, I still fit into one pair of jeans...I think they are like those magic pants from The Sisterhood of the Travelling Pants...they fit every size lol!  I also have resolved to be content with my be band and stretch out a few pants with that, so that brings my total up to 6 pairs that I can wear! whohoo!

Stretch marks: Nothin on this front, although I have ALOT of itching!!!! I think its a combo of my skin stretching and the dry winter air...NOT fun!  I had to get up last night and put on lotion it was so bad.

Sleep: Not much has changed here either, not great, but not terrible...been watching a little too much Law and Order so I always have to convince myself that there is no creepy stalker in the apartment before I can drift off to dream land :)

Movement: I pretty much feel her moving a little every day now, it's a nice little treat!  Bryan got to see her kicking the other night, so that was EXCITING!

Food cravings: eh, not so much, I crave food in general right now...I think partly because I have gotten a little sloppy with my protein intake, I really need to get back on that!  I get about 60-70 grams per day, but I feel better when I'm closer to 80 or 100.

Food aversions: Still stands, NO Mexican or popcorn and pretty much any kind of chili/sloppy joe smell makes me wanna die, we are having this thing at work, called the 12 days of Christmas where everyone gets a day and brings something...uhg, people come on!  no more!  if it smells it should be banned!!!! Pretty funny on my day, I brought vegan pumpkin gingerbread (no smell :)  and it was gone in about an hour. haha and they didn't even know if was good for them!

Belly button: It is so the exact same, I must have a very stubborn one, or just lots of skin to stretch!

What I'm looking forward to: a few things...1.  I have my next appointment Monday, and that's always nice to hear that everything is going good.  2.  Also yesterday I booked my flight to go home in January! So I am looking forward to spending some time with family and friends, probably the last time before Lola arrives!  3.  Christmas, I love the holiday! We are having a Skype Christmas with my family on Christmas Eve, so that'll be fun, our first with little Judah, the cutest nephew I have ever seen!

Weekly Wisdom:    Relax!  Sometimes it doesn't come naturally and you have to chose it, but its always an option, giving things to God and letting go, when you have absolutely no control.  I am learning this more and more.  I don't know much, but I do know that God is here for me and willing to listen to my heart and guide me. 

Weekly joy:  Well, it's been a tough week at times (my hormones are completely throwing me for a loop) but just making it to this point, 22 weeks, is a blessing in itself!

Saturday, December 11, 2010


This morning, I have just been overwhelmed with all that I have been blessed with.  Spending time with God, my little girl kicking me, my hard working husband, my Christmas tree, running, being a vegan and making such amazing things :) and a wonderful family that loves me, despite of my flaws.  It's this time of year that is so often overlooked because it's over in a blink of an eye.  I must say that I am seeing it differently this year, in a new light of gratitude. 
Today has been very productive so far and yet it's not the usual "Lindsay" productive of blowing through my to do list just to get it all done.  I've actually been enjoying the process, it's very refreshing and the slower pace is not nearly as terrifying as I once thought.
Just wanted to share some of from my day so far...

After my nice relaxing run and yoga DVD I made some vegan blackberry oat bars...

I made them with all fruit jam, so no high fructose corn syrup...and no it's NOT just sugar!  They have a chia egg, which I am falling in love with because they are so easy to make!  (1TBSP Chia + 3 TBSP Water, and let sit for 15 minutes)  They have sesame seeds on top for a little extra nutty flavor...look and smell DELISH!

I did some laundry and dishes and got ready, then I had a little photo session, since people have been asking for pictures...
Just the belly...

I look a little stoned in this one, but you get the full effect :)

Side view

So there she is...getting bigger and I think more cramped every day, last night I actually SAW her moving around from the outside!  I remember my sister-in-law, Jess, telling me when she saw Judah moving around in there....she was right, totally crazy and amazing!

And the view from my computer is pretty nice too...
Merry Christmas!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Monday, December 6, 2010

20 weeks and 4 days...

Total weight gain:  Not weighing myself in between appointments...not really that interested...or maybe not really seeing the benefit in knowing, cause if it's high then well...what are ya gonna do, ya know!?  Trying to eat healthy and workout...that's all I can do

How big is baby? The internet says...10 1/2 ounces, around 6 1/2 inches long from head to bottom and about 10 inches from head to heel

Maternity clothes: I gave in and bought a pair of khakis from Kohl's for work...not a huge fan, but the waist is much more comfy and they give me something else to wear.  They are a little big so I'm hoping they will last me until the end!  Still using the Beband, but I am starting not to like the bulkiness and weird lumps that my pants get with it on.  Trying to hold out and just use it as long as possible though.

Stretch marks: Nothing new, been using jojoba oil alot...

Symptoms: Lately I've been getting cramps in my hands every once in a while, but nothing that lasts more than a second or two.  I've also been SUPER tired.  I could go to sleep at 7 every night if I wanted to.  I also have like NO patience with people or myself.  I get so worked up about the stupidest things!  Although now that I think of it, that hasn't really changed much being pregnant :)

Sleep: Sleeping is about the same.  Still have trouble getting comfortable and wake up a few times at nite.  But nothing too serious

Movement: Still kinda hit or miss, nothing really regular or really noticeable.  Once in a while I can feel her from the outside, though.

Food cravings:  hmmmm...I've been trying to make some more new vegan recipes lately.  I made eggplant and zucchini "lasagna" this weekend (with tomatoes, navy beans, nutritional yeast, olive oil and garlic-I think this stuff was amazing!  The eggplant tastes very much like noodles and the beans and yeast really are a nice combo) and made some cookie dough balls with no added sugar using dates, oatmeal and cashews (and dark chocolate OF COURSE!)  and they taste pretty close to cookie dough I must say!  For lunch I have been making quinoa or something with some veggies and dinner has been some kinda pasta with diced tomatoes, spinach, Italian spices and garbanzos.  I've started having cream of wheat for a snack in the afternoon.  It's one of those comfort foods for me, my mom used to make it for us alot when we were little.  I don't really have cravings, like middle of the night ice cream or anything.

Eggplant and zucchini lasagna...didn't use the vegan parmasean cheese as you see here, but you get the idea...


Cookie dough balls...didn't have toothpicks, so I just used my fingers :)  Look pretty convincing, huh!?

Check out these and other recipes at !

Food aversions: Mexican is still a major no no.  Anything processed, it has this smell that makes me wanna run the other direction.  I don't know if it is the sodium or what.

Workouts:  I have been pretty consistent with doing the elliptical 5 days a week, lifting 3 times, yoga once and running on Saturdays.  The running is definitely different, not too mention alot slower, but I can feel my ligaments and muscles working so much harder especially around my core and they are definitely a little sore.  But it feels good to be back and able to start slow.  Oh and YES, my midwife said it was perfectly OK for me to do these things! (just in case anyone wondered, not that I've been incessantly badgered by anyone about it.... :)

Got a prenatal  yoga DVD from the library, Zen mama...wasn't terrible!
Zen Mama Prenatal Yoga Workout with Rainbeau Mars - DVD

Belly button: Still no change

What I'm looking forward to: I know your supposed to enjoy every minute of being pregnant...blah, blah,blah...but today I am really just looking forward to April 21 and this process being over and me being able to hold and see Lola. 134 more days to go!

Had a very productive weekend, getting the majority of Christmas shopping done and decorating.  We won't have a tree again this year, but we've upgraded to stockings, poinsettias and a wreath for the door  Less than 3 weeks till Christmas!  Scary!   I still have a few things I need to buy and make, but I feel much better now!

Wednesday, November 24, 2010

Week 19!!

Lola Pearle update :)

Total weight gain: 11 lbs...This last appointment with my midwife I shot right up there!!  Must have been the almond butter kick I was on there for a while!  It's nice though to be at peace with the scale, I mean I don't wanna go crazy.  The only frustrating part is one day I'll be able to wear something and then next week it's too small.

How big is baby? says the size of a mango

Maternity clothes: I bought one of those bebands from Target, it works pretty good.  A few of my pants I can't button anymore so with the band I can still wear them.  My jeans I still need a belt with but I have been wearing the band instead, because it is SO much more comfortable.  My sister-in-law gave me a bunch of her maternity clothes.  I have worn a few of the shirts, but don't think I need the pants quite yet.

Stretch marks: Havn't noticed anything to much maybe a few on my legs, but I'm sure there will be more to come!!  Although they say it's genetic and my mom didn't really have many other than her legs :)

Symptoms:  The nausea has gotten less, but every once in a while, probably once or twice a week it throws me for a loop. I've noticed my back is tight alittle more too, last night at yoga I felt like I was 90!!!

Sleep: Sleeping has been interesting...even though I am not that big yet, I still can't get comfortable.  Poor Bryan has to put up with me tossing and turning every 2 minutes.  I am using a extra pillow to support my back or put between my knees, but I still REALLY miss sleeping on my back!!  I also have to get up atleast once or more during the night to pee, it's a pain! But I do feel much better when I drink a ton of water. 

Movement: I can feel her every now and then when I am sitting or laying still.  It's the craziest thing!  I can't wait till it happens all the time.  When I got my ultrasound on monday she was on her head with ther legs crossed indian style and her hand down by her face.  So cute :) 

Food cravings: Nothing really that I would say I crave.  I've been on this mushroom and spinach kick for a week or two.  At first I would throw in some tofu and baked potato, but I found a new thing in our pantry, that Bryan bought probably like a decade ago :)  Bulgar with soy!  It has 10 grams of protein in a 1/2 cup!! and I just put the mushrooms and spinach in there with a few garbanzo's like protein heaven ;)

Food aversions: Ugh, I don't even wanna type it, but Mexican.  I can't even look at a Mexican restaurant when we drive by without gagging...and there are ALOT here.  Hummus turns my stomach now too and anything with seeds gives me MAJOR heartburn.

Belly button: Don't notice any change yet...

What I'm looking forward to: Getting out of this fat stage.  People look at me like, oh wow your gaining weight but they aren't brave enough to ask if I'm pregnant yet.  I just wanna have a nice little bump and not just bigger everything else :)

This will be my first official Oklahoma Thanksgiving!  We were in Costa Maya last year on our honeymoon.  So it will be nice to relax a little and enjoy a day off with family.  I'm making salad, green beans, acorn squash and some vegan pumpkin gingerbread ...yum :) 

Tuesday, November 23, 2010


"My God will supply all your needs..." has been trying to wedge itself into my thoughts all day today.  It's one of those days where you just trudge through worry.  It's a constant battle and very exhausting.  I think it might partly because of some great things that happened yesterday, ironically.  We got to see our baby again on a ultrasound and found out that it is a GIRL :)  It's exciting to be able to dream with a little more direction now that we know that piece of the puzzle.  It's also brought me alot of feelings of being overwhelmed.  For a hundred different reasons.  The main ones being provision and raising a girl.  I know God will supply our needs, it's something that I have to set my mind on, let my burden down and just rest.  He knows what the future holds.  The other issue of just raising a girl overwhelms me, I think, because I know the struggles that I faced being a girl and feeling the pressures that go along with it all.  I want to set a good example and be able to have the clear testimony that God can bring you out on the other side of the struggles and that He can even use the failures too.  I guess this is one of those times when you know what to do, it's just doing it that is the kicker.  Praying that God will give me the strength to take the first step of trust and that I will lay down these things at His feet knowing that He will take care of me and my little girl.

Monday, November 15, 2010

Great Expectations

So what exactly are expectations?  Some practical people might say, preconceived demands placed on a situation.  More emotional people, like myself, like to refer to them as dreams...sounds so much more dramatic and let's me be the martyr.  Broken dreams sounds much more appealing than unmet expectations, don't you think??   But let's be real and call them expectations.
I am learning right now the importance of letting these ideas go.  It's not so much about not having the thoughts at all, as it is about not being consumed with them.  Maybe it's a form of coveting.  Wanting something to turn out a certain way so badly that it takes over your thoughts and actions.  I justify my disappointment with pity.  "It's not fair"  has run through my head several times in the past weeks. 
I think of lyrics to a song that I used to listed to alot in high school.  It talks about God having deeper dreams for us than we can imagine.  When you put it that way...letting go of something good for something amazing, it seems to easy, so obvious.  Why is it still so hard? 
It's such a process.  One day I say I can trust God with anything, He holds the future and I need to just lay my burdens down at His feet and move on with confidence that He will work it out.  The next day I am focused on what I don't have and how I can get it.  What my life needs to be and how I need to get there.  It's draining to go on this journey of constant ups and downs, but I have to hold on to God, even if I stray I have to be still and know that He is God.  He knows what will happen and what needs I will have before they are even a passing thought in my mind.  Praise God for his unending wisdom and unexplainable love!

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

God's will...not mine

These past few days have been emotionally exhausting.  So exciting to see my new nephew and family.  So hard to say goodbye.  I've been really challenged to review what seeking God's will is all about.  It's so easy for me to go with my heart...that's how I live my life, what I feel translates into what I say and do.  Not always a clear translation, I'll admit, but I have no trouble reacting to what's going on inside my head.  Sometimes this comes out as passion, and I feel justified in my response, other times it is merely reactive and comes across as immature and manipulative.
My dad has been encouraging me to deny myself in this area.  Not to let those negative thoughts become predictors of my life.  I stand at a crossroads.  I have a choice to make, either go with what I am feeling in the moment, basing my decisions on this momentary idea that I have and reap the consequences of using my finite mind to select my course.  Or take one step at a time towards what God wants.  Constantly seeking Him and what He wants for my life.  The first comes with some big risks and even bigger problems.  The other is much more intense, but much more sure.  Sure in the fact that I know someone who can see and control everything is making the decisions clear and giving guidance and support.  One way is so tempting to me.  I get to be in what I hear in the back of my head...then my heart gently speaks up saying...but how do you know the outcome, how do you know that is what you truly want?  My heart has been speaking louder lately.  Pressing me to be completely dependant on God and his wisdom, rather than my roller coaster emotions.  This comes as a daunting task for me, because of the roots I have allowed this problem to grow.    But I know it is a worthwhile task to take on.  No matter what happens, I know for sure that God loves me, He will never leave me and He will provide ALL my needs.  Whoa, those are more than just Sunday School answers, they are hard core, life shattering truths!  Why am I here?  My best guess would be to make me more like Christ.  What will I chose?  It's still up for discussion at times, but I will pray the higher road...

Thursday, November 4, 2010

I am 16 going on 17...weeks that is!

I can't believe that I am 4 months along on this journey of being pregnant.  The time drags mostly, but when I look back I can't believe I am here already!  4 more weeks and I'll be at the 1/2 way point! Craziness!!  It's really easy to get worked up about the little things (even with my personal ban from researching anything online, because quite frankly it can be terrifying!).  Sometimes I worry about if I am giving the baby everything it needs with the food I eat...which in part is aggravated by all the lovely, well meaning (I think) people who say I need to eat cake and ice cream with a side of chips and steak.  Somehow I don't really think my baby can grow it's strongest if it starts life on a steady diet of junk.  I pray for wisdom every day that I will know what is best.  But I was just sitting here thinking about our bodies and how much we don't know or understand that goes on.  WE don't hold anything together.  While I know we aren't supposed to throw caution to the wind and live recklessly, there's got to be something to say for seeking after God because He holds it all in His hands.  I mean, the world has gone on in spite of our greatest efforts to create complete chaos and something in that says, We are the creation.  Plain and simple.  I think about my new little nephew that I am going to hopefully meet TOMORROW!! His little life was planned by God, he was brought into the world as a part of a bigger plan.  God knew that Bryan and I would be his uncle and aunt and Jess and Jared would be his parents.  He knew my dad would be his grandpa.  Life isn't an accident, even though it's not always in our plans.  It's in His.  I pray that I will one day be able to fully embrace the freedom that this acknowledgment brings.  We are to strive to live like Him, He'll take care of the details.

Tuesday, November 2, 2010

I'm an AUNT!!

Can't believe it! He is actually here!!!!  Judah Thomas Gard was born November 1 at 10:19pm.  It's such an exciting time.  And SO incredibly hard to be so far from home right now.  Our family has been through so much these past few years that this time of great joy is hard to watch from a distance.  As I sat up last night...or I guess it was this morning, waiting to hear from my family, I kept dreaming of what it would have been like to have my mom here.  She would be so proud of Jared.  They always had a special relationship, that I don't really think alot of sons have with their moms.  It's hard to feel that hole that her presence in heaven leaves in our hearts.  I feel very much like I need to fill that role at times for Jared, but I know that he has a mom, though she's not here, but he needs a big sister too.  Every time something big like a wedding, birthday, or even holidays roll around it always brings back good memories and lots of emotion.  I don't know if God shares with my mom what's going on with us or not, but I still ask Him to.  She was actually the first person I told that I was pregnant.  It helps to bridge that gap in my mind and make her feel very much apart of what's happening now and not just the past.  I'm excited to see my dad in his new role as a grandpa too.  He has so much to offer little Judah and I know that he will be an amazing influence in his life. 
I am excited to be an aunt (not to discredit my 17 other nieces and nephews on Bryan's side:)  and to have the opportunity to be apart of this new phase for Jare and Jess. 
I have been praying for months about this time because I knew it would be hard.  God has worked it out that I will be going home on Friday and be able to be WITH my family.  It is a blessing and I don't want to lose sight of that just because I want to be there now.  God has a plan for Bryan and I and He knows that my hearts desire is to be an active part of my new little nephew's life.  I pray that He gives me the wisdom in how to do that. 

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

Ready to face the pancakes :)

Ok, after a very long break, I'm back!  I couldn't bring myself to look at that stack of pancakes picture that I had in my last post.  My nausea just wouldn't let me!  But I summed up the courage today and went for it!  I think I may actually be starting to feel better...major hesitation there, but I am feeling like fewer things set off my gag reflex and it is more tolerable, which is FANTASTIC!  Because I just couldn't really function with that feeling all of the time.
So much has happened in the past several months!  Not to mention the fact that we are having a baby! It's weird even typing that! Hasn't really sunk in, it's one of those things you dream about your whole life and never really think it could happen to you!  It's exciting, nerve wracking and an amazing expirience so far.  I am seeing a midwife verses a OB doctor.  I am hoping for a low intervention, all natural expirience with a fast recovery!  (in my dreams anyways :)  I love our midwife, she is super nice and laid back and has had 2 natural deliveries herself, so she can relate. 
We have had 2 appointments with her.  The first we had an ultrasound and saw the baby!  That was crazy!!  Then last week we went for our 12 week checkup and heard the heartbeat, 166 beats per minute, so nice and strong!  We will go back in 4 weeks and 5 days (but who is counting :)  to get the BIG ultrasound and find out what we are having!!! Bryan is hoping for a girl and I'm kind of 1/2 and 1/2.  Either one is good, a boy would be perfect for my little nephew Judah to grow up with and a girl would be good too though. 
So I hate to cut this short, but there will be more to come!  Thanks for checking back :)

Sunday, August 22, 2010

Leaning tower of PANCAKES!

Well, I'm up :(  It's too early to be up on Sunday, but I have to leave for work at 7, so I have to suck it up and just enjoy it!  I decided I needed a reward for getting myself out of bed...Pancakes! :)  Spelt Healthy Pancakes from Angela at are fluff and the recipe is for one!

Healthy Spelt Pancakes
1/2 C Spelt Flour
1 t cinnamon
tiny pinch of sea salt
1t baking powder
1/2 T Manitoba Harvest Hemp protein powder (optional)
1/2 C Almond milk

Mix together dry ingredients the night before.  In the morning just mix in the milk spoon onto medium hot griddle, use oil or non stick spray.

I added a mashed banana in between the pancakes.  They were soooo good!  And now I am ready for the day!
Have a good Sunday!

Saturday, August 21, 2010

What a day!

Well it all started with a little green, then a run/walk then back home for Vegan Overnight Oats with some banana topping and raw almond butter, yum! 

Then it was off to get my oil changed and make a Whole Foods last one that takes 25 minutes!! (Our new apartment is only a few miles away from it!) I needed to pick up some bananas and almond butter and pitas.  I found these pitas with carrot and lentil flour and some other stuff too.  Seven grams of protein! 
Then I went home to eat lunch and go get my hair cut.  I haven't had a hair cut in a while so I was looking a little like a disaster.  Then I went and got my eyebrows threaded.  I found this girl from Iran who does an amazing job.  Good brows always makes me smile :) 
Then I came home and started in on the project of the week....
 I knocked out the storage closet, living room and bathroom.  So just the kitchen and bedroom and we'll be well on our way outta here.
It was a very productive day, but I am EXHAUSTED!  Time for some dinner and a night of relaxing till Bryan comes home. 
I found out yesterday that I have to work at 7:30 am tomorrow.  YUCK!  But hopefully not too long, we are taking an upgrade on the system and we have to be there to test everything before Monday morning. 
Hope you had a wonderful Saturday!  

Thursday, August 19, 2010


Well it's official, I started packing!  Good thing I guess, since a week from today we are moving :)  It's exciting to start fresh in a new apartment with new carpet and a fireplace!! Wohoo!!  Bring on the Fall!!!  Hoping that this mini heat wave this weekend is the last of the 100s we see for this year! 
Today is going pretty well.  I had to train a cardiologist this morning, it's a very good lesson in patience and listening :)  It went well though.  Then Bryan is off and we are taking a trip to Whole Foods at lunch :) That makes me happy, I love to go there, very relaxing and I just feel good after I leave ...although my bank account can't always say the same!
This morning I had some Vegan Overnight Oats based on the recipe at

1/3 C. rolled oats
1 C Almond Milk (I'm sure you could use whatever kind you want)
2T Chia seeds (these make the oatmeal, they absorb all the liquid and really add a TON of good nutrients)
1T Hemp (I add this to pump up the protein)
1 banana mashed (small)
Cinnamon ( I add alot, I LOVE cinnamon)

Whisk all ingredients together, cover and put the the fridge over night.  If you really wanna get crazy, freeze a banana and then right before your ready to eat throw it in the food processor and blend till smooth.  Then layer that in between layers of the oatmeal.  I'm telling you it tastes like dessert for breakfast!

Hope you have a fabulous day!!

Tuesday, August 17, 2010


This morning it was so not hot, I couldn't contain my excitement!  It's been stifling here for just about forever.  even the nights stay in the high 90s so when you walk outside in the AM it's like hitting this wall of heat and humidity, not very energizing!  But today!  Today was fantastic, in the 70s and cloudy, haha that sounds depressing to read, but really it was great!  So great that I ventured out for a slow run.  It was nice, I felt like I was somewhere in October with the nice breeze, perfect weather!  Although soaking in the morning does have it's consequences, I got back from my run at 7 and I am supposed to be to work by 7:30...yeah didn't happen.  But it's ok, they survived without me :) 
Today feels like a fresh beginning for some reason.  You know that feeling in the fall when you are getting ready to go back to school and everything is new and clean, it's my favorite time of year and I do believe that today it is starting to peak through the blazing sunbeams of the summer. 
I was reminded this morning that God has a plan, I know it's pretty "Sunday school".  But today it seems to penetrate deeper, it's a real plan, nothing I do can mess that up.  I just need to seek God's wisdom and He will handle the details.  It's so freeing to think of.  We don't have to worry or stress or get anxious about anything.  Ahhhh if I could just hold onto this feeling forever!
Have a wonderful day!

Monday, August 16, 2010


Life has been a little crazy here in Oklahoma!  We are moving in a week and 3 days so we have to start packing up our lives and moving just a few miles to a cheaper, but nicer apartment :)  I cannot wait to get out of the second hand smoke zone!!  It's nauseating!  Fresh air here we come! 
This weekend was pretty low key, Bryan and his brother in law ran the 5k in some stinking hotness!  They did great tho!  Saturday I tried to run, but my pelvis didn't like that too much so I basically took a long walk.  Bryan worked and then after work we went to this Greek restaurant that I got a gift certificate from.  Had a delicious pita with hummus and some tabbouleh.  Reminds me of the good old days in Queens with the Greek music blaring right outside my window :) 
Sunday was pretty laid back went to church and took a nice long nap, which was good while it lasted, but then I woke up completely disoriented, I hate when that happens!
This morning I had another super yummy green smoothie, it really gives me the motivation to get up in the morning :):)  Had a good cross training workout and headed to work.
Well I have to go teach a computer class to some doctors...wish me luck!! :)  Have a great day!

Tuesday, August 10, 2010

Green and Go

Green Goodness :)
Well this morning it was a bit of a struggle to get out of bed, but I knew that I would feel better once I got moving.  I have been doing something new for my pre-workout meal.  Making a green smoothie.  It is sooooo good and gives me tons of energy.  Not to mention tons of other great stuff like antioxidants, anti-inflammatory and anti-cancer, high in beta carotene, vitamin K, vitamin C, lutein, and not shabby on the calcum.  All that before breakfast :)

1 frozen banana
hemp protein powder (or any protein powder, really)
1 handful of fresh organic kale
a scoop of greens powder
a little water

Blend until smooth and Enjoy!

It sounds a little, well, green at first :)  But I am telling you it is good!  The banana adds alot of sweetness and texture.  There is also tons of other ideas at .  It's a great way to start your day! 
Well I am sitting here finishing up and actually kind of enjoying my peppermint tea :)  So I better get moving.
Have a great day!

Monday, August 9, 2010

an extreme makeover

This weekend was busy, but good.  Not what I really felt up to after the week I had, but I believe that God is doing some major renovations inside of me. I can see things changing in the way that I think and the needs that I have.   I went to the conference on Friday and Saturday, which was very challenging and refreshing.  Then church was good, some great reminders about being persistent and seeking God constantly.  I am feeling better too!  Today I did my normal cross training workout and lifted upper body. I did a little abs and then stretched big time.  I still feel tight, but I am definitely not feeling the pain that I did before.  I think I might switch up my training and do cross training 3 days a week and do an easy run and a short speed workout along with my long run, once I am back to 100%.  My body has never really liked 5 days of running a week, so I was probably not smart to think anything had changed!  I am so thankful to God for the encouragement of healing!  I also know that if I wasn't healed that He would have still taken care of me.  That's the lesson I do not want to forget! 
Otherwise things are going good.  Saturday I made toast quinoa.  It was SUPER easy.  Just mix quinoa, sunflower seeds and a touch of maple syrup.  Then bake it for about 15 minutes at 325, I think.  It's like a sweet protein treat!  Bryan loved it too :)  Sunday morning I continued our new tradition of having breakfast together, sitting down and just taking our time.  It was a really good time to reconnect and just rest.  I made some spelt pancakes topped with almond butter and mash bananas.  Delish!  I'm still forcing down the hot tea... trying to be a tea person...I guess it takes practice :)  Sunday night I made veggie burgers again, a little different than the first ones I tried and a little easier.  These had beans, (I used garbanzo cause I have a TON, but it called for black beans, anything would probably work)  oatmeal, pumpkin seeds, cinnamon, cumin, garlic, salt, pepper, chili powder and Cayenne pepper.  You just blend everything, form patties and bake for 40 min.  They tasted really good, kind of a Moroccan feeling with the cinnamon and beans. 
Bryan works normal hours today! YEH :)  So I won't be asleep when he comes home and we could actually eat together! 
This coming weekend we are supposed to run a 5k with Bryan's brother in law.  Bryan isn't a hardcore cardio guy, so this has definitely stretched him, but he's really been pushing himself and doing great!  Bryan is definitely doing it, but we will have to see how I feel by then.

Saturday, August 7, 2010

Going Beyond...

I have had a tough week, I have pretty much been stripped of every coping mechanism and am standing completely in God's hands.  Between not being able to run and having to rest in His plan for my life in the future.  Plus those little things, like Starbucks (yes you read right, I am proud to say I am in recovery 11 days now without a single drop!:) 
I went to the Going Beyond conference with Priscilla Shier.  It was a stretch for me, since I didn't really know anyone else going, other than a few women from my church.  It was an amazing time of just surrendering.  Just being still and watching God rearrange me and remind me that even in those times when I get hung up and anxious about the past and future, He is able to create something in me.  He is able to use me, as long as I am willing.  Talent and personality don't limit your usefulness to God.  It's amazingly freeing to watch other women be real about their struggles, but not only that.  It's so exciting to hear of how God can bring them through and above those things and make something great out of their life.  I pray that I don't leave this weekend unchanged.  I want to continue on this journey towards complete surrender and complete freedom. 

Friday, August 6, 2010

Looking up

Today is going much better.  I went to the chiropractor and he thinks it's unlikely that I fractured my pelvis again.  He says its probably from my sacroiliac joint not working properly and my back is very tight on the left side.  So hopefully with a little patience and $$, I'll be back in no time! Praise the Lord!! 

Thursday, August 5, 2010

Struggling point of view

This morning was another difficult one.  My hip still is aching and my head is spinning.  Decided to hold off on cross training today.  If there is still pain, I don't wanna chance it.  I am praying so hard that it is nothing and that the rest will do me good. 
It's crazy how things like this can effect EVERYTHING.  It's like I am looking at the world through this constant state of struggle.  Nothing looks right.  It's definitely a choice that I have to make whether or not to let it bother me, but my mind is in a constant state of thinking, as usual.  One little thing can throw us off track, and it's really up to us to decide how we are going to approach it. 
I'm so goal oriented and when suddenly a goal is suddenly in limbo, it's like I have all this pent up energy and no outlet. 
Last night I made these seed crackers, they kind of remind me of Mary's Gone Crackers, if you've ever seen them.  They are a little less crackery, if that's a word?  But they weren't bad.  I tried to take some pictures of the process to post them, but I searched high and low and couldn't find the cable to download them from my camera :( So I'll have to keep looking. 
Today Bryan is off, I am SO jealous!  But it's Thursday at least!  This weekend I am helping out with the Going Beyond Conference with Priscilla Shier.  I kind of don't FEEL like going, but I am sure I won't regret it. 
Well I guess I better get back to work.  Have a great day!

Wednesday, August 4, 2010


Resting is an interesting concept.  It implys that you are stopping some activity and on the onset seems to be nonproductive at best, even detrimental at worst.  But I am learning otherwise.  Taking a step back can ironically be equal to taking a giant leap forward. 
I am taking a day off today from running and trying to relax and not let my mind wander with this sudden pain that started yesterday in my hip.  Its hard to understand if you aren't a runner, but it's like putting time, effort and heart into something and then not being sure you will be able to see the fruit of your work come about in the way you wanted it to.  This journey that running and exercise in general has taken me on has truly been life changing.  Although it may see superficial to some people, it's actually a very emotional and personal undertaking.  The ups and downs that come along with it can really be great metaphors for life and teach you how to react when you feel lazy or discouraged.  I am learning to stop and listen to my body more.  I tend to be reactive and emotional with my decisions and not make lifestyle choices intentionally. In yoga I hear so often about being intentional, focusing your mind on something.  While the new age ideas I dont agree with, intention is something that I need more of.  What is my intention for today?  What do I feel God wants me to do or is trying to teach me?  Stopping and really sitting still to wait for Him to lead is super hard, but I think that it will only make us more productive and happier in the end.
 I am praying that with some rest and additional crosstraining in my training plan God will allow me to still run in New York, but His plan is way beyond November.  We'll have to sit, wait and see.

Tuesday, August 3, 2010

Turn on the oven, stick your head in...Welcome to Tulsa!

Today has been a little rough, I'm not gonna lie.  It started with my hip hurting during my run this morning.  Ironic since I just confirmed all my stuff for the New York marathon.  Something like this happened two years ago before the marathon...think it was mostly mental last time, so I am hoping that is the case this time too...but will take it easy the next few days just in case. Then had one of those days at work...Got home through the blistering 104 degrees and the air conditioner wasn't working!!! ahhhh! Trying to relax and breathe!! :)  Let's hope for a better day tomorrow!

Made some vanilla overnight oats for Bry, with 1/3 c oats, 1.5 T Chia seeds, 1c almond milk, vanilla protein powder and 1/2 a banana mashed.  Put everything in a bowl, whisk together and cover.  Put in the fridge overnight and cross your fingers :)  Made mine with raspberries and carob instead of the banana and protein. 

Here's to snow, ice and Christmas!! Come quickly!!!

Monday, August 2, 2010

Monday Blues...Blue is a nice color though :)

So it's Monday, SUPER hot, supposed to be 105 today, and well, it's Monday.  Trying desperately to have a positive outlook, but the weekend is so faaaarrr. 
Ok, so I'm done complaining.  I had a pretty good morning so far.  Got up and spent some time reading the Bible.  Bryan and I are doing this year long plan for reading the entire Bible.  It's great to be able to read for myself so many things that I had forgotten, and be reminded of promises that help me throughout my day.  The other day I read Isaiah 44.  Verses 2 and 3 really caught my attention. "I will go before you and make the rough places smooth; I will shatter the doors of bronze and cut through their iron bars. I will give you the treasures of darkness and hidden wealth of secret places, so that you may know that it is I.  The Lord, the God of Israel that calls you by name."  Just a good reminder that not only is God with me right now. He is going before me and showing me things, hidden things, that only He can.  It's an exciting and powerful passage.
After that I headed to the gym for a easy run and to lift a little.  Then came to work and enjoyed my overnight oats that I made yesterday.  SOOOOO good!  You just throw all the ingredients together and put them in the fridge overnight.  I tried raspberries, blueberries and carob with some chia seeds.  Very filling too, although I did want to lick the bowl :) 
Yesterday we had a meeting after church with the other youth leaders to start helping out there.  Bryan and the new youth pastor have been meeting and talking about where Bryan could plug in.  They have come up with an idea for a leadership team for the the kids.  I will be helping too!  So I think it will be a great opportunity.  We are excited to see what God does through it all. 
Hope you have a great Monday :)

Saturday, July 31, 2010

Perfect Morning

This morning was a little out of routine for me, but I am learning latley, that that isn't always a bad thing!  I got up early to get a jump on my 14 mile training run for the marathon.  This week in Oklahoma it isn't supposed to get below 100 all week pretty much, so I wanted to avoid heat stroke :)  I always struggle with what to eat before I run.  Somethings really upset my stomach, but I need something to give me energy.  I have been starting to make smoothies with a frozen banana, blueberries, hemp protein, greens powder and a little kale for good measure.  Other than being a little over anxious to get it made, and losing half my spatula in the blender, it was delicious!  (I found the piece of spatula towards the end :)  It really gives me the energy that I need without weighing me down.  I ran out  and back 7 miles on the River Parks trail, which is a forever long trail, mostly along the Arkasas River.  It was really pretty perfect.  I took along a homemade energy bar (Super easy, dried bananas, dates and almonds all thrown in the food processor and then just form them into bars) that helped me make it towards the end.  I decided to make some pancakes when I got back to refuel on some carbs.  So I made these absolutely delicious ones with spelt flour, blueberries and carob.  Then added some mashed bananas as "syrup". I love being vegan!! So many great things to try! (mostly thanks to my new blog obsession  Once I finished those I headed off to yoga with Bryan.  And let me tell you I needed a good stretch like you wouldn't believe!
So that was my super great, perfect morning!  Hope the rest of the day is just as good!

Begin at the beginning

Life is funny.  One day you think you have it all figured out and the next nothing is certain.  Going through several huge changes in the past several years has been quite a ride, but I can definitely say that it has been worth it.  I used to pray that God would keep me right where I was.  It was a time in my life where I thought I had it all figured out, I was happy, or so I thought.  Actually I was so terrified of moving downward that I was content to stay put.  Oh how I underestimated this life and the God that gave it to me.  I am on a journey, slowly learning to trust and ask God not to leave me here, but to take me higher than I ever could have dreamed of. 
I chose the title a change in the making, because that is what I am and always want to be, redeemed, moving in the upward direction, closer to God and never being satisfied with where He has me, but being hungary for something bigger. 
It's a journey and I want to take it all in, every single second!  In thinking about how I might better be able to soak it all up I think one of the most exciting things for me is to be able to share my thoughts and life in a real way.  So this is the perfect place for me to do that. 
I am training for the New York City Marathon in November, trying to become a great vegan chef :)  and becoming a full fledged aunt the fall (not that the other, I think 18 don't count, but ya know, this is my little brother!!
:)  So I am sure I will have lots to share!
I want to be able to journal my thoughts about everything from running to food to family and friends.  So come along for the ride.  I have a feeling it's going to be great!